"Dearest Ba, the love was, as you admit, beneath
all the foolish words– I will lay your pardon to my heart with the other
blessings– All this missing of instant understanding—(for it does not amount to
misunderstanding)—comes of letters, and our being divided. In my anxiety
about a point, I go too much on the other side from mere earnestness,—as if the
written words had need to make up in force what they want in sound and
promptness—and assuredly if I had received such an impression
directly from your suggestion (since not a “desire”,—you dear, dear Ba!),
I should have begun at once to ask and argue .. whereas, it was only to the
memory of what you said, an after impression, that I wrote in answer.
Well,—I will certainly “love you till Saturday,—and even after”.
Did you indeed go to the Abbey? How right to go! Every
such expedition is the removal of a world of apprehensions. And why not accept
Mrs Jameson’s offer now, stipulating for privacy, and go and see the Museum,—the
Marbles? And the National Gallery, and whatever you
would wish to see. At Pisa, Ba, the Cathedral will be ours, wholly—divinely
beautiful it is—more impressive in itself than the Florence Duomo—and then the
green grass round, over the pavement it hides.
And considerably more impressive than the party at Mrs
Milner Gibson’s last night—whereof I made one
thro’ a sudden goodnatured invitation which only came yesterday—so I went “for
reasons”– Chorley was there, looking very tired as he said he was. I left very
early, having accomplished my purpose.
You know you are right, and that I know you to be right
about Mr Kenyon—no confidence shall I make to him, be assured—but in the
case of a direct application, with all those kind apologies in case his
suspicion should be wrongly excited, what should I say?—to Mr Kenyon, with his
kindness and its right, mind—not to any other inquirer– Think of the facilities
during the week among the Quantock Hills!– But
no matter,—nothing but your own real, unmistakeable consent, divides us– I
believe nothing till that comes– The Havre voyage was of course merely a
fact noted—all courses, ways, routes are entirely the same to me–
Thank you, dearest. I am very much better, well,
indeed—so said my doctor who came last evening to see my father whose eye is a
little inflamed—so shall Ba see, but not take the trouble to say, when I rejoice
in her presence to-morrow. Dearest, I love you with my whole heart and soul– May
God bless you–RB"
I wonder what his 'purpose' was at Mrs. Milner Gibson's? And isn't his statement that nothing divides them except her "own real, unmistakeable consent" very pointed. Hasn't she given that already? Message surely sent, what shall be the response to that? We may not know directly since he is going to visit tomorrow.
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